Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Real Beauty: Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

Most women can pick out a 101 "flaws" when it comes to their looks, the way they dress, their posture or their body type. Women pick out every wrong thing that they see in themselves and are their worst own beauty critic.
Growing up everyone would compliment me on my hair, my eyes, my skin and my clothes. Still to this day I receive the same comments, (this isn't supposed to sound conceded) but I hear these compliments and I do not see what they see. Do I try my best to look good, keep my appearance up to "standards" and maintain a decent beauty sense. Sure. Do I love the compliments and comments made about my appearance? Most definitely. The difference is, someone could say these nice things about me and I completely disagree. My hair, it's plain, straight and blonde. My smile, the same smile as anyone else's except my teeth could be whiter and my hockey accident that scared me in the fifth grade is something I will never forget. I see every imperfection on my face and if I don't wear makeup, oh wait that never happens! My clothes, I buy what's on sale. I look for the most inexpensive item that looks half way cute and throw it in the cart.

When I look in the mirror I see average. Stand me next to my best friend or another girl and I stand there feeling even worse about myself. I pick out again every "flaw". Even on video chats, I find myself wishing I had never logged on to begin with. I feel insecure and I look at the girl in the image and that's not what I feel inside. I want to feel like I am pretty, like I am beautiful, like I am sexy but I cannot believe that this is so. The photos prove it, the video images prove it and what I see in the mirror proves it.
I think this is what every woman thinks. There are only a handful, 4% according to Dove that consider themselves beautiful. We all look in the mirror and remember that one comment or statement that someone said about us when we were younger. Even now you might have heard someone say something about you and it has stuck with you. I had someone tell me that I walked with my chin in the air, like with my nose in the air and tilted back. I had the way that I walked pointed out, toes pointed out instead of in. The people who know about my hockey accident, yeah they were the ones who made middle school a living nightmare. These statements along with a lot of others has stayed with me forever. I trained myself to fix these things but also became very insecure at the same time.

It started with the small comments and snowballed into a large confidence eating monster. As I have gotten older I have come to realize that I need to be myself, "flaws" and all. I need to accept who I am and throw out the bad thoughts and focus on the good ones. Am I pretty, beautiful and sexy? Yes. Do the people around me see this? Yes. Are these compliments and comments said just to be nice? No. The people who have said these nice things are close to me. My friends, family and close relationships. These are the people who are honest and real. So instead of focusing on the negative parts of myself I am using the compliments to boost my confidence and accept that "I am more beautiful than I think." By looking at myself in a different light I have become more positive, happier and less depressed. One of my New Years resolutions was to not care what others think and focus on just being me. I think I can say I am slowly but surely kicking that New Years resolutions butt!
Take a look at this video promoted by Dove. Dove hired an FBI-trained forensic artist to draw two pictures of several women. The first based on the woman's descriptions of themselves and the second taken from the descriptions of a stranger who had met them earlier that day. The differences are astounding! This goes to show that the opinion we have ourselves downplay what is actually there. We are all beautiful, remarkable and unique. We need to appreciate what God has given us and be grateful for our natural beauty. There is no need to compete or compare ourselves to others because we are all amazing just the way we are.

Have you watched an advertisement or campaign recently that stuck with you?
How do you relate to this video?
Do you find yourself critiquing your looks?

1 comment:

  1. We just watched this commercial last night and I could not believe it! I think we're all guilty of not feeling "pretty" enough and that we're too hard on ourselves. Maybe women are just perfectionists? I wrote a post on something like this yesterday... beauty is inside and outside and we have to start believing it in order to feel it and look it. You're gorgeous; stop doubting it ;) xoxo


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