Real Beauty: Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

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Most women can pick out a 101 "flaws" when it comes to their looks, the way they dress, their posture or their body type. Women pick out every wrong thing that they see in themselves and are their worst own beauty critic.

  

Growing up everyone would compliment me on my hair, my eyes, my skin and my clothes. Still to this day I receive the same comments, (this isn't supposed to sound conceded) but I hear these compliments and I do not see what they see. Do I try my best to look good, keep my appearance up to "standards" and maintain a decent beauty sense. Sure. Do I love the compliments and comments made about my appearance? Most definitely. The difference is, someone could say these nice things about me and I completely disagree. My hair, it's plain, straight and blonde. My smile, the same smile as anyone else's except my teeth could be whiter and my hockey accident that scared me in the fifth grade is something I will never forget. I see every imperfection on my face and if I don't wear makeup, oh wait that never happens! My clothes, I buy what's on sale. I look for the most inexpensive item that looks half way cute and throw it in the cart.

When I look in the mirror I see average. Stand me next to my best friend or another girl and I stand there feeling even worse about myself. I pick out again every "flaw". Even on video chats, I find myself wishing I had never logged on to begin with. I feel insecure and I look at the girl in the image and that's not what I feel inside. I want to feel like I am pretty, like I am beautiful, like I am sexy but I cannot believe that this is so. The photos prove it, the video images prove it and what I see in the mirror proves it.

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I think this is what every woman thinks. There are only a handful, 4% according to Dove that consider themselves beautiful. We all look in the mirror and remember that one comment or statement that someone said about us when we were younger. Even now you might have heard someone say something about you and it has stuck with you. I had someone tell me that I walked with my chin in the air, like with my nose in the air and tilted back. I had the way that I walked pointed out, toes pointed out instead of in. The people who know about my hockey accident, yeah they were the ones who made middle school a living nightmare. These statements along with a lot of others has stayed with me forever. I trained myself to fix these things but also became very insecure at the same time.

It started with the small comments and snowballed into a large confidence eating monster. As I have gotten older I have come to realize that I need to be myself, "flaws" and all. I need to accept who I am and throw out the bad thoughts and focus on the good ones. Am I pretty, beautiful and sexy? Yes. Do the people around me see this? Yes. Are these compliments and comments said just to be nice? No. The people who have said these nice things are close to me. My friends, family and close relationships. These are the people who are honest and real. So instead of focusing on the negative parts of myself I am using the compliments to boost my confidence and accept that "I am more beautiful than I think." By looking at myself in a different light I have become more positive, happier and less depressed. One of my New Years resolutions was to not care what others think and focus on just being me. I think I can say I am slowly but surely kicking that New Years resolutions butt!

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Take a look at this video promoted by Dove. Dove hired an FBI-trained forensic artist to draw two pictures of several women. The first based on the woman's descriptions of themselves and the second taken from the descriptions of a stranger who had met them earlier that day. The differences are astounding! This goes to show that the opinion we have ourselves downplay what is actually there. We are all beautiful, remarkable and unique. We need to appreciate what God has given us and be grateful for our natural beauty. There is no need to compete or compare ourselves to others because we are all amazing just the way we are.

Have you watched an advertisement or campaign recently that stuck with you? How do you relate to this video? Do you find yourself critiquing your looks?

Baby Your A Firework!

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From the moment I saw Katy Perry in concert and heard the song Firework, it sparked a flame inside of me and has been going strong ever since.

Now don't get me wrong I let almost everything bother me.

I over analyze every small detail and question myself constantly.

What outfit to wear, how my hair should look, what is trending, how will I fit in and the list continues.

I think almost every girl and woman has this evil voice inside their head convincing themselves that the standards of the "popular crowd" is the only way to be.

Well let me slap a big fat reality check to that statement and say this:

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These days the image portrayed is to be skinny but curvy, have gorgeous hair and a flawless face. Well you and I both know this is unattainable.

If you are striving to become the perfect representation of what everyone else thinks,

STOP NOW!

The only person who needs to be happy is YOU.

Only your opinion matters.

You are the only one who should be judging anything about yourself.

As my daughter grows up more and more each day all that haunts me are thoughts of the "mean girls" though out my life that I had to deal with and still deal with. Elementary, middle and high school there were always the few who made it a point to try and pick out every little negative thing about my group of friends or myself. Still to this day whether it is on Facebook, Twitter or through texts and emails you experience it as adults. The ugly remarks, the sarcastic phrases they pass off as jokes and the ignorant gestures made. It gets old. I think at a certain age, for most people at least you start to gain this new found confidence. That you are who you are and nothing will change that. I think I gained my confidence after I had my daughter. I saw the love she had for me, that what I looked like didn't matter and that she would always love me for me. So I took that into my entire perspective of life and ran with it. If my friends loved me for me they would understand if I didn't have the nicest clothes, handbags or latest hairstyle. If they loved me they would be okay with the fact that I don't want to go partying every weekend and that my fun time is spent playing board games, watching cartoons and being a hermit at home (most of the time). If they loved me they would respect that I am the overprotective mother and wife. And that I come off very reserved and unfriendly but I am really just shy and once you get to know me you totally understand everything. If my circle couldn't deal with the way I ran my life then they needed to be removed immediately. Self image is one thing but striving to become someone who are not just to please everyone else doesn't cut it. You have to make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy.

With that being said BABY YOUR A FIREWORK!

Remember that you are beautiful, you have potential and that the world cannot stop you from achieving greatness! Strive to be yourself, unique and one of a kind. Do not fall into the trap of what society perceives as "PERFECT". You can't please everyone!

I will leave you with inspirational, motivational and heart warming thoughts :)

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Do see problems with this in your everyday life?
Problems in your kids life?
Please leave a comment and tell me your story!
I hope this inspires and motivates you to all your true potential and that you have SO much to offer!